“Have some self respect” literally has nothing to do with me. It’s about you rating and weighing my behaviour against a 2 dimensional caricature of a women that you think deserves basic decency. I respect myself.
What you mean is “please conform to my personal, rigid beliefs of what I deem acceptable for a woman because it’s up to me to decide who deserves to be treated like a human being or not based entirely on meaningless socialized and sexist values”